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| President Obama was
awakened one night by an urgent call from the Pentagon. “Mr. President,”
said the four-star general, barely able to contain himself, “there’s good
news & bad news.” “Oh, no,” muttered the President, “Well, let me have the
bad news first.” “The bad news, sir, is that we’ve been invaded by
creatures from another planet.” “Gosh, and the good news?” “The good news,
sir, is that they eat reporters and pee oil.” |
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| On July 8, 1947,
witnesses claim a spaceship with five aliens aboard crashed on a
sheep-and-cattle ranch outside Roswell, an incident they say has been
covered up by the military. March 31, 1948, about nine months after that
day, Al Gore was born. That clears things up. |
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| So I picked up this
alien chick, and she couldn't remember how to get back to her ship, so we
ended up driving in crop circles all night long... |
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| Two aliens landed their
ship on a golf course and watched a young man golfing. First he hit it
into the high grass, mumbling and cursing he retrieved his ball. Then he
hit it into the sand bunker shouting curse words he retrieved the ball.
Next he hit a perfect hole in one, then the first alien said to the
second, "Uh-oh cover your ears he's going to be really mad now"! |
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